“My lover is mine and I am his.”
Song of Songs 2:16
Are you a five-star lover? If not, you can become one! Being a great lover involves much more than just the physical side of love. Your love life should encompass the totality of your relationship.
First, a great loving relationship begins with acknowledging that you belong exclusively to each other. Your spouse is your love gift from your Heavenly Father and you are to “keep yourself unto him or her as long as you both shall live.”
Second, a great lover is other-centered. He seeks to server the other. She is kind, courteous, and considerate. Your goal should be to please each other.
Third, a five-star lover, like a multi-faceted diamond, demonstrates the many facets of love. What do you think of when you think of sex? Most men tend to think of physical closeness, while most women tend to think of emotional closeness. Both are components of a five-star love life, but a great love life includes other facets such as: trust—feeling safe with each other; mutuality—freely choosing to love each other; honesty—openly communicating your true feelings; and pleasure—giving joy to each other. All work together to create an atmosphere of romance and intimacy--which is a great setting for becoming a five-star lover.
So how is your love life? What are the best aspects and what areas would you like to work on? From our national Love, Sex, Kids, and Marriage survey we learned what couples considered the best aspects of their love life. While the responses were varied, several themes emerged as essential components for a five-star loving relationship.
You may want to talk about how you are doing in these areas:
· A five-star lover puts his or her spouse first and seeks to bring pleasure to the other.
· A five-star lover dares to always be truthful but never unkind.
· A five-star lover affirms his absolute loyalty to his mate.
· A five-star lover sacrifices for his or her spouse.
· A five-star lover energizes the relationship with fun and laughter.
· A five-star lover says often, “Hey, let’s have a date!”
· When your mate asks you for a date, a five-star lover responds, “Yes!”
We would add that a five-star lover understands the components of love: trust, mutuality, honesty, pleasure and intimacy. Just talking about how you can be a better lover will energize your relationship. This is one conversation with a long-term pay-off!
Your love is more delightful than wine.
Song of Songs 1:2