Alone at last, Steve and Jan looked at each other across the candle-lit table. The old Italian restaurant was a perfect setting in which to celebrate their twelfth wedding anniversary.
I wasn’t sure we were ever going to get here,” Jan said. Then she rattled off how she had coordinated—piano lesson, homework, and she had even found another dad to sub for Steve at soccer practice that evening.
“Now that you brought up soccer,” Steve said, “I’m concerned about the lack of parental support for the team.”
Jan then mentioned the problem with Hannah’s kindergarten teacher—and Joey simply could not start nursery school until he was potty-trained.
Over dinner the conversation moved from the kids to their budget. As usual, money was tight. “As a matter of fact,” Jan said, “We should head home and relieve the babysitter.”
Later back at home, after putting Joey to bed—the babysitter couldn’t get him to sleep—Jan and Steve snuggled on the couch to watch a movie. But after a few minutes, both fell sound asleep. Some anniversary.
Then next morning, Jan and Steve rehashed the night before. Even after overcoming mountains of obstacles to celebrate their anniversary, they had spent most of the evening focusing on the kids, finances—everything but their relationship.
“We used to be best friends, soul mates, lovers,” Jan said. “Now it’s more like we’re running a business—a family business. We keep saying things will change, but nothing does.”
“There’s always a crisis—at work or at home—and we just seem to run out of energy and time before we get to us.” Steve added.
Discouraged, they looked at each other. And then they realized ultimately, it was up to them to make a change. In the silence, the answer came . . . It is never too early or too late to make changes! Today, you can choose to make your marriage a priority.
That morning Steve and Jan made the choice. They agreed to try a thirty-one day experiment. For the next month they would carve out ten minutes a day to focus on each other. Whether early in the morning before the kids woke up, or in the evening after the kids were in bed, they agreed to spend ten minutes together and acknowledge it as their couple time.
During those thirty-one days, they faithfully claimed their couple time. Even in those times when they were too tired to talk, they invested ten minutes holding each other and sitting close to each other. Did it make a difference?
“Yes,” Steve told us. “It was just a little step—just ten minutes a day—but we proved that little steps, if taken in good faith, can change everything.”
Time is a very precious gift of God;
so precious that it's only given to us moment by moment.